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And it went ok . I just laid it out to them . This is it now , that in 5 years the memory holes might be pretty big and its up to them if they want to see him/ring him more. I assured them I was not going to nag nor was I going to bring this up again with them . I will always answer any questions . But I figure these days they too can go online and read about PD . Daughter-in-law was present and she is a geriatric personal care worker so I figure she knows what's what. They were all pretty defensive .. Work .. Their kids blah blah .. I nicely accepted all that but I'm just telling them like it is now . I left it at that . So I feel ok . It won't be eating away at me anymore . All done .. Moving on ! Thanks for listening all . Appreciate it Lynne |
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FWIW, I think you handled it perfectly. This is a horrible situation for everyone involved and all you can do is be honest about things. Each family member has to handle it on their terms and hopefully they will always be at peace about that. Having this talk allows you to move on and put this issue behind you. Good for you |
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Thanks Lurking . I got them altogether and although I had asked a adult grandchild to sit and talk to to him with 5 mins he was on the phone wanting to know where I was /come back now I want to go home . That was a bit of an eye opener to them . Something else I discovered yesterday he has 8 adult grandchildren all have partners etc non of them have been told their poppy has PD. . How sad is that . But I'm not even going there 😀 |
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Lynne, My two children have vastly different attitudes. 20 minutes ago I told the daughter that lives with me (upstairs) that he had a really bad fall at 4 this morning. She scolded me "why didn't you call me"....and I said he had stripped his clothes off and did not want her to see him naked. She responded "he just has to get over it". I tried to remind her that his dementia is taking over at night and it is increasing so HE WON'T just "get over it". And my son barely calls....and has told friends it hurts him to see his Dad so diminished. Shame on on your children for not telling their children. Do they think it is hereditary, or that a pill will "fix it"? My seven year old granddaughter seems to understand the best. She is forever reminding him not to try to carry a water bottle when he uses the walker, but to put it in the seat pocket. And she reminds him about the pills. One of your grandchildren may rise to the problem and be an asset to you, too. Bless you dear. |
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It is upsetting when you have family close by and they can't seem to find the compassion and love to do what little it would take to visit and be of some assistance. We have only my hubby's one sister and brother in law 5 minutes away from us. They are very active in the church and volunteer for many organizations. Do they bother with visiting? No, they say it's too hard to spend time with him because he's in such a bad way. We have one son here who is good with helping out and the rest of our family is 4 hours away or out of state. It's a sad situation and I try very hard not to be resentful. |