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Topic Just Venting Go to previous topic Go to next topic Go to higher level

By poollady On 2022.09.28 09:58
I'm just venting here so bear with me

It just seems like whatever I do for HWP isn't good enough.

For instance I help him put on boots or shoes, have them all tied up nicely, he unties them and tries to re-tie them himself.

He accidently spills something, I get a towel and mop it up, he takes a paper towel or tissue and does it "better".

I poured OJ for him this morning, he put it back in the fridge and poured himself cranberry juice. OK I know he likes cranberry juice, but he never says anything. (That's another subject - his inability to talk when I bring up a subject for discussion)

He drops food in his lap, I hand him a napkin, he says I need a knife to scrape it off.

Each little thing is not a problem, but it goes on and on like that every day. All the stuff I do for him, he just makes me feel inadequate.

By Ben1 On 2022.09.28 21:26
poollady I am saying a prayer and hoping you get the answer you need. I have learned that venting is a good thing for a person to do & not hold it in.

By NoMatterWhat On 2022.09.29 22:27
Hello PoolLady:
I can understand how frustrated you must feel when your care and attention is met with such contrary behavior. Even when we know he would not behave this way without PD making him, our feelings become bruised, exhausted and in need of of reciprocal care that can no longer come from the person we need it from the most. Of course you feel hurt, and tired, and perhaps unappreciated. May I offer that on some level he may be trying to apply the last vestiges of his own power of choice even if he cannot express it kindly? I hope being able to share your feelings here can help you recuperate strength for another day. Although there are limits to the lengths this forum extends, we are here to listen to each other and you are not alone. I am, and others are, listening to you. I will be checking back frequently for anything else you need to add or for anything anyone else might need to share. I have appreciated the responses to my posts and am here to respond to yours as well. Wishing you the patience of Job….

By poollady On 2022.09.30 11:21
Thanks NMW and you too Ben1. I think you're right. He's just trying to do things himself that he used to do with no trouble at all. It must be really frustrating for him. Just being able to express my feelings on this forum helps a lot.

Take care of yourself too. Best wishes to all of you!

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