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My dad was on hospice for 2 months before the end. Dad had heart and kidney failure in '22, finally passing on January 2nd, 2023. The hospitalizations started in late May. In August he decided he was going outside on our deck without his oxygen right after I went to the grocery store. Apparently visual problems can occur with heart failure, the brightness of the day blinded him, so he stumbled back into the house, tripped on mom's walker (a screw on the side), and cut his leg open. His legs were already swollen from the heart failure, and his skin was thin, so what would amount to a minor scratch for anyone else actually ripped his leg open. I tried to get the VA to pay for care after that, but heard nothing back. By mid October, he fell one day and couldn't get back up due to low oxygen/heart failure. He ended up in the hospital for a couple of weeks. My understanding is they did whatever they do to stabilize someone for a transplant, but he was too weak for that. They were just hoping his body would pick up the slack after he stabilized. After nearly two weeks they wanted him to go to a nursing home for a few weeks for rehab, which he finally agreed to. But the next day told him his heart was too weak for that (he still needed two nurses to help him stand, and his blood work was apparently not what they had hoped), and that he would need to go home on hospice. The VA finally responded at that point (there was a VA social worker at the hospital) and he had 44 hours a week of a caregiver paid by the VA (dad had been rated 100% disabled since 1996--severe PTSD and shrapnel in his leg). I thought hospice would be there every day, but it was twice a week at the most, usually once a week. They would monitor his leg wound, check his medications, etc. At least it was someone I could call when things got scary, even though there wasn't much to do. We had dad's bed set up in the living room, and he spent most of those last two months staring at the tv kind of blankly. Thanksgiving went ok, except he went mostly blind in his right eye the next day. It was a huge ordeal to get him to the eye doctor, but basically the eye problem was due to the heart failure and there was nothing they could do. He always wanted fast foods with way too much salt. And they said to keep it under 2000 mg a day, or he could literally just die from the salt. I always kept him way under 2000, and he was always mad about that. Anyway, everyone was kind and understanding, and although they were there for dad, at a certain point you realize they are very much there for you too. When things got very difficult and I got extremely stressed, I thought he had a few days left. Turned out it was only a few hours. But looking back, it went as well as it possibly could have.
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